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Here are the best dating apps for singles over 40. Best dating apps and sites for singles over 40. There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but the waters can feel choppy out there for the over-40 set.
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Dating apps and websites, they tell The Post, have been both a godsend and a nightmare. “A lot of the problems that older individuals are facing when online dating have to do with their expectations,” relationship coach Marisa T. Cohen, 35, tells The Post. Since boomers and Gen Xers didn’t grow up with social media, they struggle to understand its nuances. So let these local singles shed some light on the most popular digital dating options. Here’s what they had to say about the best and worst of eHarmony, Match.com, OurTime, Lumen and more. Tinder. Among its younger users, Tinder — which lets nearby singles swipe through each others’ profiles — is traditionally considered more of a hookup app than a place to find a love connection. And while Tinder tells The Post that 38% of users are 35 and older, New York singles in that bracket say they haven’t had the best luck finding love there. “I’m not a Tinder person — there’s a whole sub-genre of bots, hookers and hackers,” says Neal, a 49-year-old divorced dad who otherwise loves the app scene. (He declined to share his last name, lest it hurts his dating prospects.) He says he once may have narrowly evaded a date with a prostitute on the app. Maria Miliotis, a 49-year-old from Queens, also isn’t a fan. “I’ve had men half my age send provocative messages and d–k pics” on the app, says the twice-married hair and makeup artist. Bumble. Consider this the Sadie Hawkins option: It’s set up so that only women can reach out to men. (Unless you’re gay, in which case, anyone can reach out first.) “Bumble has been my favorite so far,” says Donna Pettigrew Fillweber, a 55-year-old entrepreneur from Pompton Plains, New Jersey. “It’s your choice.” Todd Kosik agrees. Divorced, 46 and living in Livingston, New Jersey, he believes that having the lady reach out first is much easier than walking over to a woman in a club, which is how he met his ex-wife when he was in his 20s. Still, just because Bumble is women-driven doesn’t mean that they can let their guard down entirely. Miliotis says she’s noticed her friends’ photos being used in scammer profiles on the app. Plenty of Fish. This website doesn’t share an age breakdown, but the site itself is a dinosaur by digital dating standards. It has been around since 2003 and has singles take a personality test to help match them with people with whom they might have chemistry. The pro is that there are tons of people on it. The con is that there are maybe too many people on it. “You get ones from the bottom of the ocean messaging you,” Fillweber says. “It’s kind of sad these men think they have a chance.” In particular, she’s noticed that guys tend to drag conversations out for a long stretch of time on this site — maybe because it’s more desktop-focused than app-based, lending itself to drawn-out exchanges. “You’re a grown-ass man, ask a lady out if you’re interested,” says this mother of two. “This isn’t pen-pal time.” Lumen. This dating site is exclusively for singles 50 and over, which makes it the dating site of choice for singles such as Maria Rodriguez, 54. The county social services worker, who divorced in 2018 after a 29-year marriage, says swiping’s the only way to go. “I’m shopping around,” says Rodriguez, who likes that her app of choice — Lumen — helps her weed out potential sleazeballs by limiting the number of conversations users can initiate and banning photo DMs. eHarmony. While the company declined to provide any data on its over-40 population to The Post, the site is “pretty much the go-to for marriage-minded people looking for love that will last,” according to Mashable. The company surveyed singles in 2010 and found that the internet is the best way for people over the age of 50 to meet and marry, so if you’re in it to win it, this could be where you find your soulmate. “In my life,” dating sites such as eHarmony “are the greatest thing ever,” Neal says.