[Hot] Meeting a nice guy 2025
Posted: Thu Apr 09, 2026 12:19 am
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Article:
Why You Don’t Feel Chemistry With Nice Guys" Key Points: Being attracted to emotionally unavailable men may be due to confusing physical arousal for a romantic connection. Taking steps to spark arousal with a "nice" partner could help break the cycle and lead to a more fulfilling relationship. Have you ever felt frustrated that you seem to get hopelessly “head over heels” for unavailable men, yet find yourself impervious to the advances of seemingly nice guys who are genuinely available and ready for a serious relationship?
Click here for meeting a nice guy
Would you like to change this pattern so you can finally start enjoying a great relationship and quit wasting time with men who play hot-and-cold with your emotions? The science of psychology may come to your rescue. In a classic study of social psychology, Dutton and Aron conducted an experiment in which a female experimenter stood at the end of two different bridges and asked random men who crossed the bridge to tell a short story. The first bridge was a sturdy bridge 10 feet over a calm rivulet—let's call that one the “safe bridge.” The second bridge was a suspension bridge and traversed a 230-foot drop to rocks and rapids—we’ll keep it simple and call that one the “scary bridge.” What the researchers found was that the men who crossed the scary bridge were more likely to use sexual imagery in their stories. They were also more likely to later call the woman after receiving her phone number during the experiment—even though it was the same woman at the end of both bridges. Why did the men crossing the scary bridge use more sexual content and seem to find the female experimenter more attractive than the men who crossed the safe bridge? The results suggest that these men may have misattributed their arousal symptoms (such as increased heart rate or sweaty palms) that arose from crossing a highly stimulating, albeit somewhat scary bridge to a romantic or sexual attraction to the woman. This study may help explain a phenomenon I’ve seen in my practice. Many of my female clients complain that they don’t feel chemistry with nice guys, yet find themselves drawn to men who are unpredictable and keep them guessing (I also occasionally see this in my male clients). How to Form Attractions to Emotionally Available Partners. If you experience this in your own dating life, you might want to learn how to see good guys as more exciting and the not-so-good guys as less so. Here are some tips for doing so. 1. Make a list. Your first step will be to make a list of "Scary Bridge" behaviors. Scary Bridge behaviors are behaviors that are undesirable in a dating partner, and which therefore may result in considerable worry or irritation for you. Unfortunately, this worry or irritation might be misattributed to an attraction for the man who is provoking the worry or irritation. That is why it’s important to identify these behaviors so you can recognize them as they occur. Your list may include the following: Showing up late to a date (even if for a good reason—any type of lateness can increase anticipation, which increases physiological arousal) Canceling a date at the last minute (again, even if for a good reason— the point here isn’t to evaluate his reasons, just to notice the effect of the behavior on your physiological arousal) Suggesting a date but failing to make clear plans with you or keeping you guessing about exactly when/where the date will occur Telling you he isn’t sure if he’s ready for a relationship. It’s important not to get stuck in trying to evaluate whether his reasons are “good” or not for the behaviors above. To your body, it makes no difference—if there are sudden changes or periods of uncertainty, your level of physiological arousal can get heightened.
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Article:
Why You Don’t Feel Chemistry With Nice Guys" Key Points: Being attracted to emotionally unavailable men may be due to confusing physical arousal for a romantic connection. Taking steps to spark arousal with a "nice" partner could help break the cycle and lead to a more fulfilling relationship. Have you ever felt frustrated that you seem to get hopelessly “head over heels” for unavailable men, yet find yourself impervious to the advances of seemingly nice guys who are genuinely available and ready for a serious relationship?
Click here for meeting a nice guy
Would you like to change this pattern so you can finally start enjoying a great relationship and quit wasting time with men who play hot-and-cold with your emotions? The science of psychology may come to your rescue. In a classic study of social psychology, Dutton and Aron conducted an experiment in which a female experimenter stood at the end of two different bridges and asked random men who crossed the bridge to tell a short story. The first bridge was a sturdy bridge 10 feet over a calm rivulet—let's call that one the “safe bridge.” The second bridge was a suspension bridge and traversed a 230-foot drop to rocks and rapids—we’ll keep it simple and call that one the “scary bridge.” What the researchers found was that the men who crossed the scary bridge were more likely to use sexual imagery in their stories. They were also more likely to later call the woman after receiving her phone number during the experiment—even though it was the same woman at the end of both bridges. Why did the men crossing the scary bridge use more sexual content and seem to find the female experimenter more attractive than the men who crossed the safe bridge? The results suggest that these men may have misattributed their arousal symptoms (such as increased heart rate or sweaty palms) that arose from crossing a highly stimulating, albeit somewhat scary bridge to a romantic or sexual attraction to the woman. This study may help explain a phenomenon I’ve seen in my practice. Many of my female clients complain that they don’t feel chemistry with nice guys, yet find themselves drawn to men who are unpredictable and keep them guessing (I also occasionally see this in my male clients). How to Form Attractions to Emotionally Available Partners. If you experience this in your own dating life, you might want to learn how to see good guys as more exciting and the not-so-good guys as less so. Here are some tips for doing so. 1. Make a list. Your first step will be to make a list of "Scary Bridge" behaviors. Scary Bridge behaviors are behaviors that are undesirable in a dating partner, and which therefore may result in considerable worry or irritation for you. Unfortunately, this worry or irritation might be misattributed to an attraction for the man who is provoking the worry or irritation. That is why it’s important to identify these behaviors so you can recognize them as they occur. Your list may include the following: Showing up late to a date (even if for a good reason—any type of lateness can increase anticipation, which increases physiological arousal) Canceling a date at the last minute (again, even if for a good reason— the point here isn’t to evaluate his reasons, just to notice the effect of the behavior on your physiological arousal) Suggesting a date but failing to make clear plans with you or keeping you guessing about exactly when/where the date will occur Telling you he isn’t sure if he’s ready for a relationship. It’s important not to get stuck in trying to evaluate whether his reasons are “good” or not for the behaviors above. To your body, it makes no difference—if there are sudden changes or periods of uncertainty, your level of physiological arousal can get heightened.
how to meet decent guys
meeting a good guy
how to meet a good guy