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Confused about ",paying for dates etiquette?", Should women pay for dates? Should men pay for dates? What about splitting the bill?
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Click for a full guide... Paying for Dates Etiquette for Guys. One the one hand, you might be the kind of guy who really wants to pay for dates, at least most of the time. While this is great (chivalry’s not dead, people!) you might also feel kind of awkward. After all, you don’t want to imply that she can’t pay for herself. On the other hand, you could be the kind of guy who thinks paying for dates sucks. Short of finding a sugar mama, you’d rather your date foot the bill at least sometimes , if not just as often. Problem is, you also care about what she thinks of you — and what if she’s one of those women who would look down on a guy who wants to split the bill? To the second type of guy, here’s my take: If you’re only interested in a casual relationship, then what she thinks of you doesn’t matter as much in the long run. Enjoy the freedom and variety of meeting new people! But if you want a long term girlfriend, then you’ll have to beat out other guys in order to get it. And that means putting your best foot forward from Day 1 … by paying for dates. To help you make better sense of this, I’ve broken down what we’ll call “paying for dates etiquette” by first, second, and third dates. Below, I’m sharing my tried-and-tested strategy for making the most of each of these dates, including how much you should pay on each one. Then, we’ll discuss what happens after the third date. Should she start paying? The answer is slightly more complicated than you think. Let’s dive in! Paying for Dates Etiquette: First Dates. Always, always, always pay for the first date. Why? Yes, it’s a modern era, but seventy-two percent of women still expect you to, according to studies. And at this crucial stage, you’re competing with lots of other men. With odds like that, why would you risk splitting the bill? If she offers, simply decline, and don’t let her pay unless she makes it extremely uncomfortable. (Chances are, she won’t.) That being said, be strategic. Don’t make the first date expensive. At all . In fact, you should spend $10 or less on a first date. Even though that might seem low, ten bucks is enough to spend an hour getting to know her over a cup of coffee or a happy hour beer at a cool place. This works for a couple of reasons. First, it forces you to spend less time together (because you’ll be done with the drink in an hour or less). There won’t be enough time to find out everything about each other, so this keeps the mystery alive. Hopefully, it also motivates her to go on a second date to continue the conversation. Second, whatever place you choose will show off your creativity and sophistication — as long as you make it unique and cool (no Starbucks!). Are you still thinking you should pay more for the first date? OK, I have to be honest. When I was single, I decided to do a 100-date experiment, going on as many dates as I could to find out more about dating, myself, and life in general. One of the biggest things I noticed was that men who dropped more than $10-15 on the first date rarely made it to a second date with me. Why? Because when someone you barely know spends a ton of money on a first date, it feels the same as getting an overly extravagant gift. You feel slightly guilty, weirdly obligated, and sometimes even resentful. Take it from me: The best way to handle paying on a first date is to just make it super inexpensive (but at a place that’s worth going to). Paying for Dates Etiquette: Second Dates. If you liked my first date advice, you’re going to love this: Your second date should be completely free . Let me explain. Since you guys are now on a second date, you’re obviously somewhat attracted to each other. And because you already got to know one another on the first date, you can now start escalating the attraction so it turns into sexual desire. How do you do this? By creating sexual tension. Sexual tension is all about being physical with one another — first in neutral ways, then in more flirtatious ways. You can achieve this by creating a physical experience where you’ll naturally end up touching your date in some way. So for example, if your second date is a hike through a wooded area, you might take her hand to help her over a big rock. Or maybe you invite her to a jiu-jitsu class, and try out a couple of the moves she was confused about afterward. Any physical activity where you naturally end up physically close or touching will do wonders, assuming she’s already attracted to you on a basic level. And the best part is, dates like this are often free.
guys paying for dates rules