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Article about i was blind dating but now i see:
How Am I Still Single? ’
After hundreds of blind dates, high school teacher Li Yufei has devised a standard operating procedure to sift the studs from the duds. Yet, her search for “the one” continues.
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I was blind dating but now i see. Subscribe to our newsletter. About Us | Contribute | Contact Us | Sitemap. ‘I Go on 100 Blind Dates a Year. How Am I Still Single?’ After hundreds of blind dates, high school teacher Li Yufei has devised a standard operating procedure to sift the studs from the duds. Yet, her search for “the one” continues. Li Yufei, an English teacher at a suburban high school in Beijing, began her search for a husband in 2017. Since then, she’s gone on about 100 blind dates a year, yet none have led to marriage. In China’s matchmaking market, Li would typically be seen as a catch. Now 32 years old, she’s been living in Beijing for 14 years, is good looking, has a stable job, and holds a coveted Beijing household registration. She arrived in the capital as a student in 2010, completed her master’s degree, and worked at a major internet company before transitioning to teaching two years ago. What perhaps makes Li stand out is that she has approached her search with academic precision. Over the years, she has used a spreadsheet to record the basic information of every man she’s met, such as where he lived, whether he owned a house or a car, where they met, and who paid for the first date. She says her experiences have allowed her to develop a standard operating procedure (SOP) for blind dates to instantly filter out the duds. After matching with a man on a dating app, Li will send an invitation to meet up at Starbucks. “It’s OK for the woman to take the lead at first,” she says, but after that, the ball is in his court. “The logic is simple: If he doesn’t take any initiative, it means he’s not interested. Most of the time, when the woman takes the initiative, it doesn’t work out.” Using this system, she can eliminate up to 90% of candidates after just one date. For subsequent dates, the attrition rate is about 50%. Ultimately, she feels most relationships fail due to a lack of chemistry. “My strategy is to meet a lot of people,” Li adds. “As long as the pool is large enough, there will always be four or five people left in the end.” Li agrees that her profile makes her “highly marriageable” and insists her standards aren’t “excessively high” when it comes to screening potential suitors. So why have her rigorous efforts failed to produce the desired result? This is her story. Blind date SOP. My first blind date was when I was 26 years old, still in graduate school. Within a minute of meeting the person, I could tell it wasn’t a good match, so that date ended abruptly. After that, I continued going on blind dates, but not regularly. It wasn’t until I joined a large internet company in April 2020, when my colleagues introduced me to the dating app Ergou, that I began dating intensively. I tried a succession of dating apps, including Tan Tan, Qingteng Zhilian, Hua Tian, and Himmr, and even posted on the Shuimu forum, Tsinghua University’s private online bulletin board. In the end, I found that the most reliable were “elite dating apps” focused on the niche market of highly educated singles. Most of my candidates have come from these apps. My mom also helped me search using paid-for matchmaking services for parents in Beijing. I would meet most of the people she recommended and then give her feedback if it didn’t work out. Some of the candidates in my database were also screened by my parents. For most candidates, I would first screen them on the app. If they met my basic criteria, we would add each other on WeChat and have a brief chat before arranging a date. I believe that meeting in person is most important, so I don’t spend too much time chatting online. On the app, I get straight to the point by sending the candidate a message asking about his location, like “Hi, I’m in XYZ. Where are you?” The first round of screening starts by opening the conversation with geographical location.
i was blind dating but now i see